u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Randomize
