i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Randomize
