so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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