Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
