the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
