Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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