hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
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