:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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