i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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