They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
