Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize