do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize