yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
Randomize
