This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
