I will die if light touches me.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
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