i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
