I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
