I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
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