I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize