Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
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