k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Randomize