i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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