He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Randomize
