It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I party with great urgency now.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
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