very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
