East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
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