There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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