I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
