Reflecting on last night, I'm not sure if making out with a 43 y/o married woman at Bernie's after the Cubs game was my best life decision...
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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