some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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