In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Randomize
