I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
