We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Are my feet made of real feet?
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
