My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
My vagina just clenched in fear
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
