We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
I just blew my weed a kiss
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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