I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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