Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
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