It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
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