Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
