Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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