I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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