My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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