yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize
