It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
someone owes me an orgasm
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize
