I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I came so hard my ears popped.
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