the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
