Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Randomize
