if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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