how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
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