I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
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